The Lazy Journalist enjoys some monotonous moves and repetitive beats

Cheese and onion, peaches and cream, Eric and Ernie – most of life’s best combinations and double acts get the kudos they deserve. But there’s one other that deserves its place on any future Channel Five three-hour TV-schedule-filling rundown of the 100 best collaborations in the history of the world – and that’s listening to banging techno music at the gym.

Wednesday, 18th December 2019, 10:01 pm
Updated Saturday, 1st February 2020, 10:08 pm

I’ve always been a fan of punky or fast, shouty, noisy guitar-drenched tunes while slogging away on cardio machines or lifting weights, but of late things have taken a turn towards things electronic and instrumental.

There’s something about those cold repetitive beats that are perfect to listen to while working out. I say listening, but it’s not listening intently, more like something which blocks out all outside hullabaloo (noise isolating/cancelling headphones are a must in busy gyms) and provides a precious bit of momentum after a day at the coalface/flickering monitor.

It’s also fairly easy to access the world of increased beats per minute. Find a nice big playlist from one of the even bigger online music providers, stick the ear buds in and let rip.

The chugging electronic soundtrack rapidly becomes part of the process – pounding away as you plod along, or push and pull at weights.

Huge sprawling playlists (with charming titles such as ‘Dark Techno, Brutal Techno’, ‘Bunker Techno’ and ‘I’m Losing It to Techno’) provide music which is anonymous enough not to be intrusive, but compelling and fast enough to keep you moving.

There are very few pesky vocals to distract you from the weight/sweat-related tasks at hand, and as the beats get harder and faster, hopefully so do you.

After one recent gym sesh my endorphins were buzzing to the extent that I happily hummed along to a Phil Spector Christmas song, blasted absurdly loudly and needlessly from a supermarket speaker. So, all relatively good in terms of exercise and gym time, although I do need to get myself back to the Prince Regent or the King Alfred for a Pilates class.

But the diet/drive for sensible eating hasn’t been quite so good in recent weeks.

Grim weather and oppressive winter darkness have played a part in an increase intake of all things stodgy and lardy.

Things have also been fairly hectic at work and beyond, leading to a worrying surge in rapidly procured, prepared and consumed grub, something I reflected on late last night as I dipped a cold wedge of shop-bought Bramley Apple frangipane tart into a colder pot of shop-bought Madagascan vanilla custard...

To find out more about Freedom Leisure’s gyms visit