Milestones you want to avoid

I’ve mentioned milestones before on these pages.

I’ve mentioned milestones before on these pages: how one shouldn’t worry unnecessarily about them or the time taken in reaching them. Your children will likely get there soon enough.

It turns out, though, that there are some milestones you’d really rather your little ones didn’t reach.

Like their first fight. Tibbons marked this milestone recently, or rather another child did, all over his sweet little face. The cause of this set-to? We’re none the wiser – what happens in nursery, stays in nursery!

Or how about when they begin to view their buggy as the curtailment of freedom that it truly is? Another milestone you’d really rather do without, but sure enough it turns up anyway and you’re left to deal with a screaming child on the street, arching their back and flailing their limbs with no regard for personal safety (or, let’s face it, the general custom to behave in a dignified manner in public).

Incidentally, if anyone knows whether this milestone outlasts the life of the buggy, I’d be grateful for a heads-up.

Then there’s the one where they learn to answer back, but in such a cute or amusing way that you end up laughing despite yourself and that’s it, any stand you were hoping to take against whatever has been demanded or refused is gone. You only have yourself (and their darn cuteness) to blame.

I’m told there’s also a milestone where they learn to answer back in a less cute way, but we’re not there yet. I just thought I’d better warn you in case you’re fast approaching it and it takes you by surprise (unlikely if you’ve ever been in a park when a parent tries to coax their four- or five-year-old to leave before the child is ready to go).