Growing up in Worthing in the 1970s

Adolescent insecurities and the desire to fit in with our peers are among the themes of her graphic novel Cheery Cak (Markosia Enterprises LTD, £24.99, available from Amazon etc and www.susansainsbury.com).

Susan, aged 61, said: “In Cheery Cak the two main protagonists feel like outsiders: Jackie because of her dyslexia and Diana because of her sexuality. Jackie’s experiences with dyslexia are based on my own and on those of other contemporary dyslexics growing up before there was more understanding of the condition. I wanted to show that there is more to dyslexia than poor reading and writing skills.

“There is the embarrassment, shame and frustration of not being able to keep up in class and the stigma of being labelled ‘thick’ – and therefore not worth educating. Dyslexia often leads to anxiety, depression and panic attacks, and there is a strong correlation between dyslexia and criminal behaviour, perhaps as a result of feeling on the edge of society. Jackie’s self-esteem plummets when placed into what she refers to as ‘the thick class’ and she considers religion initially as a means of escape but, as the story closes, she is considering truancy and sex to escape the misery of school life.

"The older sister Diana’s story is an amalgamation of many people’s experiences, gleaned from the experiences of close friends.

“Additionally, two books in particular inspired me to create Diana: Dearing Hearts, detailing lesbian and gay lives in Brighton in the 50s and 60s (published by Queens Park Book), and My Policeman by Bethan Roberts (published by Chatto and Windus). Both books deal with individual’s need to conceal homosexuality because it was illegal until 1967. Even after homosexuality was decriminalised, it was considered as morally wrong, unnatural and degrading.

“In Cheery Cak I hoped to convey the initial realisation of finding yourself to be gay in those times: the dread, the shame and the knock-on emotions of feeling somehow not normal – and the need to hide this part of your life.

“Diana like many lesbians, at that time, had a boyfriend, to avoid suspicions and fit in with the norms. Through Diana, I wanted to show how that might have mental health implications, causing feeling of resentment and frustration and loneliness. Despite the heavy subject I have tried to depict it with quiet humour. I hope the book twill appeal to everyone who has ever felt they wanted to fit in or were made to feel ashamed of who they were, due to race, class, appearance, sexuality or religion. Originally I wrote Cherry Cak as a play which was performed in Camden’s ThreatroTechnis. The story concentrated mainly on Jackie, the dyslexic character in the book. After reading Daring Hearts and My Policeman. I created Diana’s character and rewrote the play as a novel alternating between the two girls as narrators.”